"Winning" the Negotiation

In an instructive article in The Times a couple of weeks ago: "How to negotiate with Iran, by a diplomat who succeeded" Matthew Gould, a former acting British ambassador to Iran, wrote of his experience of the Iranian state's negotiating style:

"The Iranians have no concept of win-win: for them a successful negotiation is one in which the other guy is left crying. If the other party is happy at the handshake, then clearly you haven’t squeezed them enough".

With such a negotiating stance, the goal commonly targeted in mediation, that of a "win-win" is of course, dead in the water - there can be no deal unless the other side is totally crushed. So how did he, as the title suggests, achieve the impossible? It seems that he did so by following the classic advice of Fisher and Ury in "Getting to Yes, " which is to ditch "positional bargaining" and instead to "focus on interests." With this approach, it didn't matter how many times the Iranians walked back in the room, after the deal had apparently been done, with "Oh, just one other thing..." provided each requirement for another cringing concession, (deal-makers for the Iranians) did not materially affect the priority (or interest) he wished to protect and walk away with.

These principles are sometimes more easily stated than implemented - there is only so much humiliation, up with which most people are prepared to put. But most negotiations do not involve these extremes, and the Fisher/Ury counsel is as good today as it was when their book was published 45 years ago. CEDR impressed upon me, during training, that parties should be urged to formulate and bargain for their "needs" rather than "wants" - and the advice has generally worked well.

On one occasion, however, it got me off to a rocky start in a mediation. Having delivered this encouragement in the opening session, I entered the room of one party, who so far had been impassive throughout. He fixed me with a steely gaze and said "Mr Shaw, I found what you had to say about "needs not wants " very interesting. But there is one thing you have to understand about me. My Needs ARE my Wants." My recollection is that the deal was done, but it wasn't the most promising of starts.

President Trump says of the Iranians that "they have never won a war, and never lost a negotiation."  Like much of the Presidential hyperbole, it has an attractive ring to it - but it hides an essential truth. Not to lose a negotiation, is not synonymous with winning a negotiation - at least not for most rational people. Generally, "Lose-Lose" is not a desirable outcome. Concluding a negotiation in which both sides have secured enough of their interests to be able to dispose of the dispute, is a genuine "Win-Win".